Well..

Merry Christmas and Seasons Greetings Everybody!

Boy.... where to start?

It's been a while since I've put anything up here I'll admit.

With the silly season upon us, and the weather, and returning to my "regular" 9-5, things have been slow to progress on the barn.

I say on the barn, because all the day to day stuff (did I mention blowing snow?) has kept me busy, actually with just barely enough time to squeeze what I absolutely need to do.

Just how much snow fell? You be the judge. I think I'd eviscerate the plow guy if he did this to me!

I had hoped to finish the warm room weeks ago, but that's been put on hold, so we've been hauling water to the horses. The temporary stalls are still temporary, and I've discovered perhaps too temporary, as Mac and Pearl seem to have found ways to escape, or at least challenge the boundaries of my design...sigh.

I did manage to get the last gable end finished... the one I had left unfinished, because it was out of the prevailing winds... that is of course, until a blizzard blows through...sigh. It's amazing how efficiently you can work when the wind is howling and snow is blowing down the back of your neck.

The weather is supposed to be horrendous starting later today...at least from an outside work perspective... rain. That means I need to get hay this morning, to be sure I have enough while we're away during the holidays. Just no repeat of last weekend...I still have an imprint of the truck's tailgate on my butt!

I've run out of clever titles...

and daylight it seems, because everytime I think of the camera, it's too dark to take pictures, so once again, they will come later. Today became another snow day from work and I finally got back at old man winter, when I went to pick up the tractor and my new snowblower! ;-D While it was in there, they fixed a couple things too... no charge, since they should have been working when I bought the tractor (block heater is a good thing in this climate). I have to say, the guys at the farm dealership in town are pretty good.

Anyway last night, I woke up at midnight, with only one thought racing through my head... (I find this happens for a lot of things, especially stuff I haven't found a solution for) the horses must go in the barn tomorrow or today since it's was after midnight, whatever.... Until now, they've been outside, despite/inspite of the weather.. but last night I couldn't go back to sleep until I came up with a solution. Thankfully I had it figured out by 2 and managed a few more hours sleep... otherwise I'd be really bagged instead of just bagged. So after blowing out the driveways (and man does that thing ever shoot snow!) Maggie and I built (I dragged her into my insanity this time too) temporary stall partitions. This is the first temporary construction I've done to date on this project... I really hate temporary... it tends to become permanent, so I made sure it was something I would have to tear down later... preferably sooner.
At 5:00pm today, unceremoniuosly by the weak glow of the single solar light I managed to get installed (and because the spotlight I had hooked up on the generator decided now of all times to burn out), Pearl became the first horse to go in the barn... and she promptly showed her appreciation for all the hard work ... by crapping on the floor.

It's official...it really is winter.

With 30-40cm of snow forecast for the next 24 hours, I think winter really did make a early debut. Already we have almost as much snow on the ground as we did for the entire last year! I guess we were overdue, the last time it snowed this much, this early, was 10 years ago (I know I remember living in the city and my son Brandon's toys (he was only a year old) were all buried in the snow and I had to dig them out...in spring). Now the other reason it's gonna snow like crazy is... because I'm building a barn! Today, despite the snow, and weather, I managed to get one gable end finished from left from yesterday. The side I started first, is the direction the wind blows... normally, except of course for today! At least all the siding is up now, and I bought a couple of tarps to close up the 2 big end doors (until I can get real ones...). Incidentally, if you want to challenge your dexterity, try putting up tarps, in the wind... by yourself. Now try and not get blown off the ladder, and get the tarps up remotely straight.

Anyway, all I need to do now is close up the loft ends and install the smaller door...build some stalls... and I can finally get the horses in. Of course winter may be over by then. Still waiting on that miracle.

Winter??

I'm baaaaack... and a little late with this post.

Well after 2 1/2 weeks in Halifax (16 of those days working straight through) I finally made it home, the project is wrapped and I hope I won't have to go back. Friday night I flew in and Sat morning, (something like 12 hrs later) I had a hammer in hand. The warm room has a ceiling now (thanks in no small part again to my father-in-law for soldiering on in my absence) and is ready to insulate and have the door installed. None to soon, because 8" of snow fell just before I got back and it was -15C when I arrived!

Thanks to another work bee (and some slightly warmer weather) on Sunday, we managed to put almost all walls up on the ground floor and about half on the road side of the loft, stopping only because we ran out of wood and daylight. Now I guess walls are a bit of a misnomer. One of the advantages of the pole frame (and post and beam as well) technique, is that you have lots of options for filling in between the posts, since they provide all the structural support. As such, we got creative and put the siding up first, before the studs, which means the building is all but closed in. OK, I know that sounds weird, but when I get around to taking and posting some pictures I hope it will make sense. Now, I'm not going to make any predictions on when, so I'm hoping for a miracle (yes, I'm at that point now) that I can finish closing things in this weekend. I guess it will depend on how much help I can muster.

Oh, and if anyone asks... I'm bagged.

Different walls for different halls.



Now it looks like a barn!

all it needs is a door(s), and some more siding, and windows and stalls, etc...etc... etc...sigh...

Up up and away...

Well, all good things must come to an end. After 5 weeks (less than 4 working on the barn due to weather) I left to go back to work (Halifax again!) I keep saying this is the last trip, and I think it finally is. So I wrap this up for a week or two while I finish out here. Good time for reflection and physical rest! I leave you with this (recycled) parting shot... my last pictures are on the camera at home.

Today was one of those days...

that I spent futzing around with a bunch of small things trying to attain something larger (that and I had some horse social issues to deal with). Running short of cement yesterday put a huge dent in time today (and the days are getting really short now). Even though I only had to mix and pour 2 bags, by the time I got the tractor setup, water hauled, mix, pour and float the floor, I was only left with enough time to frame 2 more walls for the warm room. Of course I spent a bunch of time figuring, planning and measuring out the rest of the walls and such, but those 3 hours spent mixing cement would have seen the room completely framed.

Cementing the deal.

Ok, I take it back... getting the cement truck in is just as hard as mixing it yourself, if not worse, or at least it it uses muscles I haven't used since the start of this project!

Anyway, after getting a price quote (gasp!) I decided only to pour part of the floor this year (cement is more expensive now because of the additives for cold weather). Basically the warm room and where the stalls are. Besides, the 8 cubic meters I did get (full truck!) near killed me.

Above is a picture of the warm room floor just before the pour. I hummed and hawed over what to do in here for a heat source (still on the fence), and decided in the end to insulate the slab and install the Ipex pipe anyway. I may not use it (I hope I do because dollar for dollar, this was the single most expensive square footage in the whole barn!) but once the cement is poured what's there is there and you can't put it in after so I went for it. Unfortunately none of the options for cementing a slab are very environmentally friendly, but I tried to at least pick Canadian made materials (cuts down on transportation fuel) and products that save more energy than it takes to produce them.

On the top of the floor (what will be under the slab, so I guess it's the bottom then... well anyway) is a thermal foil bubble sheet and the perimeter of the slab has 1 1/2 inches of EPS foam to act as a thermal break, with the gaps or cracks filled with expanding spray foam. Concrete is a huge heatsink and without the thermal break, all the heat would just bleed out. The Ipex plumbing gets zip-tied to the reinforcement wire I laid down, which in this case actually serves to hold the pipe down suspended in the slab more than it does to strengthen it.

Form up on me.


Plastic sheeting goes down before the cement is poured otherwise you have to spray water on it for hours until it cures, because the ground sucks the water out. It also helps moisture from
coming back up from the ground later after the cement cures.

Another big honkin' truck... at least it was dry this time.

Grey Gold!

After all that work we came up 1/2 a meter short of cement... in the warm roof no less! That means I'll have to break out the cement mixer tomorrow...sigh

Under the weather...!

It's offical, there's a roof over my head! My in-law's decided to drop in today and we gave at'r and got the final side complete! Feels good to be able to get out of the rain! Now there are still plenty of details to work out (understatement!), but the big chunk is done. If I can get the warm room done in the next 2 days and the floor poured, I'll be a very happy camper.

Every (hurricane) cloud has a silver lining...

Well maybe not, but because of hurricane Noel, my trip to Halifax has been delayed a day or two. On top of that I got a visit from a friend and colleague Jon today and we got the steel installed on the left side of the roof! This is a huge thing, because now I can frame and insulate the warm room (where the water will be) before I go (hopefully). I should also be able to get the cement floor poured (ok, I'm breaking down and having a truck brought in, it's actually about the same cost as mixing it myself and far less back breaking let me tell ya!) before I go (and before the cement plant closes for the season!).

Progress.

Kinda looks like a barn now.

Half...

One whole (looong...) day and only half a roof...

Sigh... Not there yet.

Ok, time to pay credit where credit is due.

Roofing is not something one should do alone, if merely for safety reasons. Installing steel roofing (especially on this scale) is damn near impossible by yourself. For the top section, I enlisted the help of my wife's brother-in-law's Melvin and Pat, and as usual, my father-in-law was in attendance as well. Unfortunately Pat could only stay until 2pm, but Melvin hung in until dark. Let me tell you, this guy is part squirrel! He walks around on a roof like it was the ground! Needless to say, if it wasn't for him, I doubt we would have got the top done (which, I forgot to mention, included installing a large part of the 1" straping across the trusses, since I couldn't get it done before they showed up. Hopefully he'll come back to finish installing the ridge cap (still working on my slight fear of heights).

Happy Halloween!

Aaaah! A Skeleton!















And I've come to the conclusion that building the roof structure is a %#$$@%! of a lot harder than actually putting on the roof itself!

Yesterday I got a phone call...

The help I lined up for Wednesday couldn't make it until Thursday. Turned out to be a blessing in disguise, since I would have had to work through the night to finish everything in time for the steel (as usual, sometimes things don't go as planned...). Regardless, slowing down was a good thing, as I'll be able to finish up a few other things that should make the day go easier tomorrow. And really, it's not like there's a shortage of thing to do in the mean time!

36 hours and counting.

Well it's Monday night, and Wednesday morning I'm supposed to get help to install the steel. As the pictures show, all the trusses and rafters are in place, but I tomorrow I have to install 2 rows of purlins on one side, double block 34 rafters and install 7 rows of purlins on the other, plus install all the strapping on the top trusses (fresh of the mill from Sunday). Tomorrow's gonna be a long day....

All the rafters and trusses are up.

Good end profile shot.

Really looking like a barn now...

Truss me. ;-)

Steel my heart.

Anyone who's known me for a long time knows that roofing is not my forte (ok, that may be the understatement if the century). Though it may not look like it to look at that pile, I have a building that has 3 separate roofs, totaling 100 sheets of steel and 2500 roofing screws(!)... and i want to have it all done by the end of next week!

Now we're cooking!

Getting there!

Roof over my head (too bad it won't keep out the rain...)

















60ft to the end. Do I see a light?
















My neighbour says it looks kinda like a prison.

















All those rafters and no paddles...
















Another day, another bottle of Tylenol.

Yesterday went well...

Today was well... a wash, litterally due to yet more damn rain. Other than getting soaked trying to complete some long overdue fencing, I didn't get anything much done.

and still no pictures!!!

Today... was a good day.

It's amazing what you can get done with a good sized, well motivated crew. We put well over 1000 board feet of lumber and 23 sheets of plywood and who knows how many nails into the barn today. The loft floor is complete, the rafter plates are in place (just need to finish drilling and bolting) and if it wasn't for lack of material, all the truss plates would be up (always something to slow us down...). All in all a good day.

Finally some Photos!

Is it level?

It's a big chunk of woooood....


















Shear factor!



Every post junction where a top plate
comes together or runs over, requires a scab (length of 2x8 nailed to the post) and a minimum 1/2 thru bolt with 2" diam. washer and lock washer. This is to prevent shearing forces from tearing the barn apar. All total there are 24 posts, but as in the photo, most have a junction, so require 2 bolts. Add to that the plates required to support the loft, and the side roof sections, and the final top truss plate it adds up to a whole lot of Tylenol.

Still not a barn...

Desperate Horsewives...

Move over primetime, I've my own goddamn drama in my pasture!

Ever since Pearl moved home, it's kinda upset the balance of the herd. Now horses have their own unique social structure, so this isn't unusual for there to be some competition for Alpha horse when a new animal arrives. Now, before Pearl moved in, Ginger ran the herd, and occasionally, was pretty bossy to Reba, and got Mac pushing her around too. Nothing violent, just pushy, and since she's not in foal, I attributed it to her heat cycle. Initially I split them up and put Mac with Pearl for 2 reasons; he usually gets along with everyone, and I wanted them to get used to one another because I intended to harness them together this winter. In a strange turn, Mac started being a prick to Pearl, and was pining for Ginger (forlorn looks over the fence) but Ginger stopped bossing Reba.

Then yesterday I opened the fence between the four.

Biiiiiiig mistake!

Took a while for them to figure out the gate was open, but when they did I had a real honest to goodness horse cat fight as Ginger went after Pearl. I was like some twisted soap opera where the women go batshit and start pulling hair and kicking and squealing. So I had to wade in between two 1400+ lbs crazed bitches (OK, 1 crazed bitch and one defending herself, but I digress.) and break up the fight and separate them. Meanwhile Mac and Reba are running crazy like they were watching a UFC cage match.

Now Ginger and MacArthur are together and Reba and Pearl are in the other half. Ginger has taken to the XXX equivalent of horsey foreplay to impress upon the rest that if this is the only man (OK half anyway) in town, then he's mine. I hope the neighbours kids don't come by when this is going on, I can just hear them. "Why is Ginger sniffing MacArthur down there? Ewww! What's that?"
"Uh nothing. Go ask your mother."

So now I've got one hormonal crazed mare, 1 disgruntled old bitty, one pregnant voyeur and one gender confused gelding.

We now return to our regularly scheduled barn already in progress...

Is it a barn yet?

Kinda, sorta, maybe, possibly, conceivably, could be, might be, perchance, weather permitting, almost if you squint real hard and try to imagine being inside and the smell of horse's butt then... perhaps.

Whatever the weather...

Bleargh... it's been raining on and off (mostly on) since Thanksgiving, but despite the weather (and lack of my primary helper) Maggie and I soldiered on and managed to get quite a bit done. Most of the framing work can be done by one person and an extra pair of hands. Since she's pretty strong to boot, one side of the outer top plate is up around the entire barn, and we managed to almost finish building up 3 of the inside uprights all the way to the top (16ft!). If we can get another day or two like today, I might be ready to have a work bee on the weekend and get the rafters and trusses up. Of course I've said things like this in the past (the concrete comes to mind... oops. :S ) and haven't even come close, but it never hurts to be optimistic.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Now look what I went and did...

First there was...

MacArther.


















then came Ginger...
















and...



Reba.


















Now please welcome...





Pearl.

The not so super secret recipe...

You will need.

1 tractor
1 tractor attached cement mixer
Round nose shovels
Tank to hold large quantity of water
Trailer to carry tank
4x4 vehicle to tow trailer
Three 5 gal buckets/pails

Ingredients.

1 big ass load of gravel
Whole lotta bags 'o cement
100 gals of river water
1 bottle Tylenol arthritis or your preferred over the counter (or otherwise who am I to judge) muscle pain medication


Take 3 Tylenol arthritis. No sense putting it off...

Tow trailer with tank to river.

Drive back to job site to get the pail you forgot.

Back trailer down boat launch into river.

Put a great deal of faith in the person in the truck holding the brake and stand in trailer and scoop 20 five gal pails of water into tank (remind self that this would be a good time to fix the floor of the trailer...).

Put boards/misc junk on surface of tank so that only half of the water spills out on the way back to the job site.

Preheat cement mixer to 375 deg.

Fill a 5 gal pail 3/4 full of water...strain your back pouring it into the cement mixer.

With a round nose shovel, add 20 heaping scoops of gravel to the cement mixer.

Check water level and adjust to a soupy water/gravel mix. Spit water/gravel mix out of mouth when it splashes (where did that water come from again..?)

Open a bag of Portland cement and pour almost half into 1 pail, some into your boot, almost half into the other pail and the rest on the ground... save some to inhale into your lungs...

Pick up pail of cement and attempt to pour into cement mixer...if bucket is too big for hole or otherwise oddly shaped to not fit (guaranteed) jam arm in with bucket to ensure most of the cement goes in the mixer, ensure you spin at the same RPM as the mixer to avoid much injury (torn skin no longer counts). Be sure you inhale a good portion into your lungs.

Remove bucket and arm (order does not matter). Shake cement from your sleeve. Use shovel to scrape spilled cement from ground, add to mixer. Allow to mix for a few minutes while you gag the cement out of your lungs...

Add 5 heaping shovels of Tylenol... er gravel.

Check consistency of cement, it will either be too dry or too wet, if too dry, add just enough water until it is too wet. If it is too wet, add just enough gravel until it is too dry.

Keep adding gravel/water/cement until you achieve a thick mix or soupy mix, depending on application; a thick mix looks like dark grey baby vomit, a soupy mix will remind you of the time you ate the ice cubes from your drink on that discount Mexican Vacation you took last March, or just say $%^$%&^$ it and use it like that.

Dump cement into wheelbarrow. Since the mixer doesn't dump at an angle conjunctive to the mixer, jamb the sucker underneath and bend something... eventually it will fit.

Scoop up spilled cement with shovel.

Dump cement out of wheelbarrow at almost the exact place you want it (more or less in the form).

Better take a couple more Tylenol...

Repeat 17 times or until you run out of cement/gravel/water/back muscle.

bleargh...

I think I overdosed on cement...

No time to waste...

Within 1 hour of being in my driveway, I switched the car for the truck and was off to Home Hardware to pick up cement. Consequently, Sunday turned out to be a big day. I was expecting help, and it did finally show up, but it was late, and 10 bags of cement to pour a 12x10 slab 4" thick was a little depressing... timeline wise. At this rate, it will take the entire month just to pour the floor and I'll be wrecked. I thought about calling in a truck, but that costs $$$, and I've already got money invested in a cement mixer, the idea being that I would save on the cost of the job and gain the equipment by the time I was finished. Besides, a lot of the cement work is fussy and time consuming, and a big truck won't wait around without the price going up, so after much deliberation, I decided to pour a reinforced faux footing around the perimeter (to frame the walls on) and the stalls and feed room floors and the rest will stay gravel until spring, that way I'm not rushing and can move on to the important stuff.... like the roof!

At least yesterday, I had some extra hands...

Even if they are behind her back sometimes...

On my way...

As I jumped in the drivers side of my rental to leave for the airport, I started it and flipped on the radio and out came the lyrics: "I'm goin' home...."

Well...that's all she wrote...

Until the end of the month. I wanted to take pictures just before I left to show progress, but I didn't get the chance. Tune back at the end of the Sept, for more... um...something.

Rain. Rain. Stay away.

Ok, so the rain was yesterday and last night, which slowed things down a whole bunch. Not just by cutting into work time, but also by turning the work site into a freakin' mudhole!
I broke down and bought a load of screened gravel from a local quarry to make cement (what a difference!) and ended up wasting 3 hours trying to get the stupid dump truck unstuck.
Once again my neighbour to the rescue with his trusty/rusty bulldozer (nicknamed Dozey because one light on the front is out and it looks like it's falling asleep).















Even with Dozey on the job, they needed a little extra help from Johnny.

Here's a question.
How many horsepower does it take to make 2 Deere power?

At least once the truck was gone things moved along a lot faster. I guess for now I'll have to use the gravel in the pit strictly as infill, until I can figure a way to screen out the clay/excess sand. For now though, 12 post are up, and if I can keep this pace (pray for no rain) I might have all 24 and the floor poured before I go back to Halifax on Sunday.

Can I drop you a line...

So... building a barn requires an expensive transit level or... a bunch of dirt cheap(ish) poly rope and some pegs. Needless to say, ropes got the nod for this part of the project. In actuality, the Egyptians built the pyramids this way. After having experienced this myself, I'd say they were either very patient, very lucky or they &#$^%#& swore a lot! This is one of those places that a little time (ok alot) spent pays off in the end with a straight (more or less) building.


Time for a few introductions. This is Johny (yes I have kids), my tractor. Now, buying a used tractor is like buying a horse, you never really know how old it is, or if it will kick you when you bend down to pick something up. Needless to say, I've spent a bit of time correcting it's behaviour since I bought it. (You know you're in for it when: Since the guy at the farm dealership who sold it to me retired, everyone has been apologizing to me for it...sigh). Also, since it's a John Deere (was the colour too obvious a clue) it's has a few idiosyncrasies to begin with.

Stuck to Johny's butt is the cement mixer I bought, because... well I wanted a cement mixer, and I thought one that was tractor driven would be a good idea. Riiiiiiight... Apparently it was manufactured in Italy (ok, I tried hard to buy local but this late in the year I didn't have many options (in fact this was the only one I could get without waiting until spring). Now I don't speak Italian... and apparently the people that built it don't speak English... if the manual is any clue. Now, without being too cliché I think Italians know a thing or two about cement (isn't the leaning tower of Pisa made of it?) and by that extension, they should know about mixing it, and therefore cement mixers... where they seem to lack knowledge is with North American tractor attachments! It took 3 frikin' days to get this thing hooked up and working properly! There was a trip to the farm supply store (ok, maybe that was a John Deere thing, but anyway) in there and I had to involve 3 other people and some serious cutting tools (think chop saw) to make it work! Bleargh.

Now a post frame building (a.k.a pole barn, I guess I didn't mention I was building a pole barn, but anyway), requires posts, lots of them. In this case 24 to be exact. Now I probably went a little overkill here, but I'll be damned if it's gonna fall down in my lifetime, or the grandkids lifetime. The best bet for setting posts in the ground (to me anyway) is cement (now I remember why I bought a cement mixer). Unfortunately, cement carries with it a lot of
embodied energy, so from an environmental standpoint, it's not the best thing, however, there really isn't an alternative, unless you want the damn thing to move (no a floating barn is not an option). At least mixing on site with my own gravel and water (hauled by hand from the river no less!) lessens that as much as possible.

As of this writing, there are 8 post in the ground (16 to go dammit!) with each post requiring about 2 full mixers of cement, each load takes 1/2 a 40kg bag of cement, 30 shovels of gravel and 10 gallons of water, so that's 4+480+ 80...carry the 2...=1 fuckton of work!

Semi-easy-meduim-hard day.

Loading wood, unloading wood, cutting wood, edging wood... oh and placing the square lines for the barn posts!

Now I know why they call it labour day...

Ok, so it's gonna take me a while to get this organized, due to... well, lack of time. I still want to get done what I can, so I'll have a memory jog later.


Anyway, Monday was excavation day...



Lonely little picket...











Here comes my neighbour Verne on his 1956 John Deere Bulldozer...

Talk about recycling!











First load of pit run...










Jimmy on the backhoe....










The craziest part... total out of pocket cost... $90.

Day 4 at home...

Morin'...

Ouch. I'm a tad sore this a.m. Must be the 3 solid days of grueling labor! At least now all the sawn beams for the barn are done. I have to start getting some pictures up. I'm going to take the camera to the farm today and try to get some before the excavation begins...then I've got to peel 12 - 20ft logs for the center uprights, except that I don't have all the trees yet so I have to cut down some more... hmmm where are those chainsaw pants... sigh... I guess the only easy day was yesterday...


Here's a picture of perhaps the best small scale investment I've ever made...















This is a Logosol M7 portable sawmill (sans powerhead). All those 8"x8" - 12ft long beams on the log deck were selectively harvested from the forest on the property and sawn on the mill, saving a boat load of money and lessening the environmental impact of using wood. Ideally I would have liked to cut all the wood for the barn, but time constraints (Winter! Gee how many times am I going to say that?) forced me to purchase the lumber from a small regional mill. Hopefully the trees were harvested in a responsibly manner.

Permit me to get excited here...

I GOT MY BUILDING PERMIT!!!

Home today...

Gone Sunday. Waaaaaaah!

The only easy day... was yesterday!

Ok.. so it's been a while...

Which is kind of an understatment, given all that's happened since July. Halifax was just so much damn fun (sic) that I just had to come back (insert sarcasm here), but not before going back home for the long weekend (+ a couple of days). So I'm stuck out here for work again. Bad timing (again!). Winter is coming (AGAIN!) and there's so much to do yet. Winter? What? It's August? Winter? Oh yeah it'll be here before you know it if the barn's not built! And the water's not hooked up and somehow not freezing, without electricity to pump it.
Now all this might have been what had me stressed and exhausted from not sleeping, probably a bad time to have a chainsaw in my hands. Now Mr. Safety, had all the gear on, but no chainsaw chaps/pants (because I don't own any, but I'm always careful (except for the tired/stress part mentioned above)). So it shouldn't come as a surprise when I lost control over the saw and it decided to pay me back by trying to cut through my leg instead of the tree I was trying to harvest. Needless to say, even reving down from full throttle, flesh doesn't have the same resilience as wood does.
Adrenalin has a strange affect on the body, I'm sure there's a scientific explanation, but I'll call it pure survival.
Once you stop the device that's trying to unceremoniously trying to remove a limb from your body, and you peel back the shredded pant leg and actually look (bad idea) and see the meat and fatty tissue all exposed (ick), things start to happen without any conscious thought. Colors disappear, everything become a shade of brown (who put on the sepia filter?). First, you clamp down on that sucker, cause nobody wants to bleed to death in the middle of the woods (so undignified), then you get out of danger, walk out, quickly and efficiently to safety (did I really go through all those raspberry bushes?) and yell for help (never taking your hand off the wound or even looking in the general direction). Only once help arrives, and you are in the car and hauling ass to the hospital, then can you think about passing out, before then, it's all outside of your control, unless you've done this many times or have had some kind of conditioning for this (military training? Nah, I've never seen anything like this in the recruiting pamphlets). So 3 hours and 12 staples later, I was back to work (forgoing the chainsaw in favour of buying fence posts. Once bitten, twice shy...literally). Hardcore? Maybe. Deranged? The jury's still out.